But somehow in the post-haze of birth, amid a crying newborn, the fog of sleeplessness and being hit by the train of the new world of parenthood you question everything you ever knew before.
The husband is still in shock from witnessing the agricultural horror scenes of the labour room, so he’s not exactly on top form.
And as a new mum you are mostly tearful, hormonal and waiting for the milk to start flowing.
In short, you are both actually in no state of mind to be making major decisions about the lifetime identity for your future child.
As a result for us “Grace” somehow became Talia. And “James” became Nathaniel, or Nate, for short. How we even came up with those names I still have no idea.
AT LEAST THEY’RE NOT ISIS, KHALEESI OR SHANE!
I vaguely remember mentioning a famous actor called Nathaniel Parker went to my old boarding school in England. The drugs from labour must still have been wearing off.
But Talia? I still can’t even remember where I first came across it. Derived from Greek mythology, as the muse for comedy and poetry, it must have been in one of the many baby books we were reading.
Family and friends were polite. But I could tell the grandparents would maybe have rather shared the baby news with their friends with the more sensible names Rebecca, Martha or Rachel attached.
And so I became a statistic; according to a new survey a fifth of parents in the UK regret the name they chose for their child.
An online poll of more than 1000 parents found that 18 per cent of parents regretted the name they chose for their offspring, but only two per cent actually changed their child’s name.
‘COMMON’ NAMES ARE THE ONES MOST PEOPLE REGRET
The main reason for any regret was how regularly the name was used by others — 25 per cent, the data suggested. Other sources of regret included spelling or pronunciation issues (11 per cent).
In the first year of Talia’s life I secretly considered changing her name to her middle name Scarlett — but my husband was mortified at the suggestion. He loves her name.
He said Talia was unique and stood out among the huge toddler crowds of Ellas, Mias and Charlottes in the playgrounds. And he liked Nate because it was a cool name with character, just like our cheeky little boy.
Talia and Nate are now six and eight and I asked them both recently if they like their names.
“Of course mummy,” they say looking utterly bemused. They say they wouldn’t change them for anything.
And they’re right. They’ve grown into their names. They suit the blossoming, unique characters they’ve become. And now I couldn’t imagine them being called anything else.
The only way I’ll ever get my original name choices now is going in for a third child; but it’s a no go from the old man, so it looks like Grace or James might turn out to be one hell of a classy cat!
NOT SURE YOU MADE THE RIGHT CHOICE?
Whatever the reason for your remorse, you don’t have to simply suck it up. Mum-of-three Sabrina Rogers-Anderson shares some tips on what you can do to make it right:
Use a nickname
The name you chose might have a cute nickname you’ll prefer to use, such as Abbie for Abigail or Ollie for Oliver. If you really dislike the sound of the name and you want to distance yourself from it as much as possible, you can choose a less common nickname that doesn’t sound much like the original at all.
Use their middle name
Why not use your child’s middle name if you prefer it to the first? Jeremiah Samuel can be known as Sam to his friends and family, and Katherine Charlotte can easily become Charlotte or Charlie. Most people won’t know any better and will simply adopt the name they hear you using.
Change their name legally
If you just can’t stomach the fact that your appalling name choice will be recorded in history for all eternity, put an end to your suffering and change it legally. Go to your state’s Registry of Births, Deaths & Marriages website, download the name change form and follow the instructions.
The sooner you make the change the better. Ideally, you’d want to have it done before Bub’s first birthday to avoid confusion for your child and those around you. Good luck
This article originally appeared on Kidspot