6 Little Behavior Problems In Kids You Shouldn’t Ignore 6 Little Behavior Problems In Kids You Shouldn’t Ignore
Here are six misbehaviours you may be tempted to overlook — and how to put an end to them pronto. Interrupting When You’re Talking... 6 Little Behavior Problems In Kids You Shouldn’t Ignore

Here are six misbehaviours you may be tempted to overlook — and how to put an end to them pronto.

Interrupting When You’re Talking

Why you shouldn’t ignore it: Your child may be incredibly excited to tell you something or ask a question, but allowing her to butt in to your conversations doesn’t teach her how to be considerate of others or occupy herself when you’re busy. “As a result, she’ll think that she’s entitled to other people’s attention and won’t be able to tolerate frustration,” says psychologist Jerry Wyckoff, Ph.D., coauthor of Getting Your Child From No to Yes.

How to stop it: The next time you’re about to make a call or visit with a friend, tell your child that she needs to be quiet and not interrupt you. Then settle her into an activity or let her play with a special toy that you keep tucked away. If she tugs on your arm while you’re talking, point to a chair or stair and tell her quietly to sit there until you’re finished. Afterward, let her know that she won’t get what she’s asking for when she interrupts you.

Playing Too Rough

Why you shouldn’t ignore it: You know that you have to step in when your child punches a playmate, but you shouldn’t disregard more subtle aggressive acts, like shoving his brother or pinching a friend. “If you don’t intervene, rough behavior can become an entrenched habit by age 8. Plus, it sends a message that hurting people is acceptable,” says Parents adviser Michele Borba, Ed.D., author of Don’t Give Me That Attitude!: 24 Rude, Selfish, Insensitive Things Kids Do and How to Stop Them.



How to stop it: Confront aggressive behavior on the spot. Pull your child aside and tell him, “That hurt Janey. How would it feel if she did that to you?” Let him know that any action that hurts another person is not allowed. Before his next playdate, remind him that he shouldn’t play rough, and help him practice what he can say if he gets angry or wants a turn. If he does it again, end the playdate.

Pretending Not to Hear You

Why you shouldn’t ignore it: Telling your child two, three, even four times to do something she doesn’t want to do, such as get into the car or pick up her toys, sends the message that it’s okay to disregard you and that she–not you–is running the show. “Reminding your child again and again just trains her to wait for the next reminder rather than to pay attention to you the first time you tell her something,” says psychologist Kevin Leman, Ph.D., author of First-Time Mom: Getting Off on the Right Foot — From Birth to First Grade. “Tuning you out is a power play, and if you allow the behavior to continue, your child is likely to become defiant and controlling.”

How to stop it: Instead of talking to your child from across the room, walk over to her and tell her what she needs to do. Have her look at you when you’re speaking and respond by saying, “Okay, Mommy.” Touching her shoulder, saying her name, and turning off the TV can also help get her attention. If she doesn’t get moving, impose a consequence.

When 6-year-old Jack Lepkowski, of Ossining, New York, started practicing “selective hearing,” his parents decided to take action. They told him that if they had to ask him to do something more than once, such as come to dinner or take a bath, he would get to watch only one video that day (his usual allotment is two) or he’d miss a playdate that week. If they had to remind him twice, he would lose two videos or two playdates. “I try not to give in because otherwise his selective hearing will continue,” says his mother, Lydia. “This tactic seems to be working!”

Helping Himself to a Treat

Why you shouldn’t ignore it: It’s certainly convenient when your child can get his own snack or pop in a DVD, but letting him have control of activities that you should regulate doesn’t teach him that he has to follow rules. “It may be cute when your 2-year-old walks along the counter to get the cookies out of the cabinet, but just wait until he’s 8 and goes to visit a friend who lives three blocks away without asking,” Dr. Wyckoff says.

How to stop it: Establish a small number of house rules, and talk about them with your child often (“You have to ask whether you can have sweets because that’s the rule”). If your child turns on the TV without permission, for instance, tell him to turn it off and say, “You need to ask me before you turn on the television.” Stating the rule out loud will help him internalize it.

When 3-year-old Sloan Ibanez took some markers without asking and colored one of her arms completely yellow, her mom, Tanzy, told her that she couldn’t help with painting a garage-sale sign later that afternoon. “She cried, but I knew I had to nip this in the bud or else I’d pay the price later because she’d do it again and again,” says Ibanez, of Lewiston, Texas.

Having a Little Attitude

Why you shouldn’t ignore it: You may not think your child is going to roll her eyes or use a snippy tone until she’s a preteen, but sassy behavior often starts when preschoolers mimic older kids to test their parents’ reaction. “Some parents ignore it because they think it’s a passing phase, but if you don’t confront it, you may find yourself with a disrespectful third-grader who has a hard time making and keeping friends and getting along with teachers and other adults,” Dr. Borba says.

How to stop it: Make your child aware of her behavior. Tell her, for example, “When you roll your eyes like that, it seems as if you don’t like what I’m saying.” The idea isn’t to make your child feel bad but to show her how she looks or sounds. If the behavior continues, you can refuse to interact and walk away. Say, “My ears don’t hear you when you speak to me that way. When you’re ready to talk nicely, I’ll listen.”

Exaggerating the Truth

Why you shouldn’t ignore it: It may not seem like a big deal if your child says he made his bed when he barely pulled up the covers, or if he tells a friend that he’s been to Walt Disney World when he’s never even been on a plane, but it’s important to confront any type of dishonesty head-on. “Lying can become automatic if your child learns that it’s an easy way to make himself look better, to avoid doing something that he doesn’t want to do, or to prevent getting into trouble for something he’s already done,” Dr. Wyckoff says.

How to stop it: When your child fibs, sit down with him and set the record straight. Say, “It would be fun to go to Disney World, and maybe we can go some day, but you shouldn’t tell Ben that you’ve been there when you really haven’t.” Let him know that if he doesn’t always tell the truth, people won’t believe what he says. Look at his motivation for lying, and make sure he doesn’t achieve his goal. For example, if he said that he brushed his teeth when he didn’t, have him go back and brush them. When 5-year-old Sophia Hohlbaum started stretching the truth, her mom, Christine, told her the story of “The Boy Who Cried Wolf,” in which a boy who’d been lying cries for help for real and people ignore him. “Storytelling helps kids view the problem from the outside in,” says Hohlbaum, author of Diary of a Mother: Parenting Stories and Other Stuff. “Now Sophia’s very straightforward with me?and she’s very self-righteous if I don’t believe her.”

Henry Okafor

  • Kyneshia Bond

    November 22, 2016 #1 Author

    This very true. Not only for parents, but for educators also. Behavior tell us a lot about children, and when we see behavioral problems we should address them. Ignoring them will only make the behavior worse.

    Reply

  • Kyneshia Bond

    November 22, 2016 #2 Author

    I think article is great for parents and educators. As an educator I can honestly say that students behavior will tell you a lot about how they are feeling, & the same goes for toddlers with their parents. Ignoring the behavior problem will only make it worse, I’ve seen it happen. When we see these behavior problems, we should address them immediately!

    Reply

  • Nicole

    November 22, 2016 #3 Author

    I find this very helpful. My son seems to be extremely rough with others to the point it makes him laugh that he’s hurting others. He has an upcoming appointment scheduled.

    Reply

  • Dorothy Nicole

    November 22, 2016 #4 Author

    I finds this very helpful because my son always seem to be extremely rough with other children. He seem to enjoy hurting others. This is an eye opener and he has an upcoming appointment.. THANK YOU

    Reply

  • Sierra

    November 22, 2016 #5 Author

    Honestly so glad I read this, as a first time mom I probably would have had a trouble child with the stuff I would have let her get away with. Glad I know now.

    Reply

  • Sierra

    November 22, 2016 #6 Author

    Honestly so glad I read this article, as a first time mom I would have let my child get away with more than half of this stuff. But Im glad I know now. Hopefully I won’t have a trouble child. Lol

    Reply

  • Dalisa Calderon

    November 22, 2016 #7 Author

    I wonder if this really works…. got to try it to find out!

    Reply

  • Dino

    November 22, 2016 #8 Author

    Great Read

    Reply

  • Ariel Annen

    November 22, 2016 #9 Author

    This is a GREAT article! Thanks for the great tips!

    Reply

    • Brittney

      November 24, 2016 #10 Author

      Yes it was very good thanks for the tips

      Reply

  • Shateala jordan

    November 22, 2016 #11 Author

    I have a two year old daughter that is currently doing everything in this article.. Im trying to be paitent with her and talk and tell her why she shouldnt do it but its nt working.. At least i know im going about it the right way

    Reply

  • Shateala jordan

    November 22, 2016 #12 Author

    What if i am already doing this and its not having a effect on my daughter. She is only two could it be that she is to young

    Reply

  • markell burgess

    November 22, 2016 #13 Author

    Show your child positive attention 💯 not negative👎

    Reply

  • Brushawn Brightwell

    November 22, 2016 #14 Author

    I try my best and discipline my child at the best of my ability

    Reply

  • Brushawn Brightwell

    November 22, 2016 #15 Author

    Kids are meant to be took time with

    Reply

  • Shateala

    November 22, 2016 #16 Author

    Im trying this with my daughter it really hasnt had an effect on her but im going to keep trying

    Reply

  • Raquel

    November 22, 2016 #17 Author

    I have a very intelligent beautiful respectful 16 year old but over the years I’ve seen my attitude in her from time to time unfortunately I let it slide so now here I am being a little tough sometimes then felling bad , but it’s my fault for not nippoing it in the bud years ago.

    Reply

  • elias mcneely

    November 22, 2016 #18 Author

    So true. I really enjoyed reading this article.

    Reply

  • Zoey Gonzalez

    November 23, 2016 #19 Author

    Our Kids Behaviors Should Be Keept In mind Because Sometimes those may be signs that something may be wrong .! Just an opinion

    Reply

  • Miranda

    November 23, 2016 #20 Author

    I’m interested

    Reply

  • Miranda

    November 23, 2016 #21 Author

    This is really true. And I’m interested

    Reply

  • Bella love

    November 23, 2016 #22 Author

    This is a very great article very useful tips for moms like myself. I feel reassured as a parents after reading this because some of these things I have already been doing and working with my five-year-old on.

    Reply

  • Ebony

    November 23, 2016 #23 Author

    I found this helpful

    Reply

  • Leina naalano

    November 23, 2016 #24 Author

    Wow this is a great article… m defin8tly gonna try it out…especially wen shes pretendin nt 2 hear me coz she loves doi tht!

    Reply

  • Minispha

    November 23, 2016 #25 Author

    This is so helping for both parents and Nannies

    Reply

  • Minispha

    November 23, 2016 #26 Author

    This very helpful to both parents and Nannies

    Reply

  • Minispha

    November 23, 2016 #27 Author

    Your right this really happens so many times
    Ts so helping

    Reply

  • Misty

    November 23, 2016 #28 Author

    Great article

    Reply

  • Lexi Hernandez

    November 23, 2016 #29 Author

    So many useful tips !

    Reply

  • Brittney

    November 24, 2016 #30 Author

    Yes This Is Very True Kids Try To Tell You Anything It Can Be good Or Bad You Never Know You Have To listen This Was A Very Good Article

    Reply

  • Brittney

    November 24, 2016 #31 Author

    Yes this was very good great tips

    Reply

  • Shatanja Fields

    November 25, 2016 #32 Author

    This is a great read all the articles are very helpful

    Reply

  • Ashley Velazquez Ayala

    November 26, 2016 #33 Author

    Awesome article, very helpful.

    Reply

  • Desmond

    November 27, 2016 #34 Author

    wow interesting article I enjoyed reading this

    Reply

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